The Best Policy

I could completely get used to having a totally anonymous blog.

The funny thing about blogging is that it's supposed to be a quasi diary, but the trouble is that everyone wants readers.  And the trouble with readers is that once your friends and family begins to read your blog, you have to censor yourself, because the people who annoy you most, to the point where you want to write about them, are generally either a friend or a family member.  I know this because I have other blogs and I'm forced to be sensitive and politically correct otherwise I get a nasty-gram from someone who isn't pleased about being featured, or who is mortified by my opinion.

I like this ability to be nameless and faceless person.  The only person who knows of the existence of this blog is my boyfriend, and he lacks the intellectual curiosity to find and read it.  A man that asks absolutely no questions is definitely not going to spend any time investigating the location of my blog.

And since I'm being honest, why not jump in and be honest about people's reaction to my news that I'm having a hysterectomy.

First, most people get really sad looks on their faces, as though I've announced that I'm having a frontal lobotomy.

Then, they essentially call me stupid.  They don't come out and directly call me an idiot, but their followup questions indicate that they believe I'm a moron who doesn't advocate for my own health.  I've heard some of the craziest questions:

1.  "Do you have a good doctor?"  Naah.  He's actually homeless, but he's what I can afford

2.  "Did you get a second opinion?"  Absolutely not! Even though I conduct major research on every minor gadget that I purchase.  Why in the world would I conduct the same, if not higher, level of research when my uterus is in question?

3.  "Why don't you get one of those minimally invasive surgeries?"  Why?  Because I have a MAJORLY invasive womb -- large enough to scoff at anyone who would try to remove it with a mere laser.  If my doctor doesn't have to use a machete to get this bitch out, I would be totally surprised

4.  "Have you tried homeopathic treatment?"  While homeopathic medicine is fantastic when you're trying to stave off a problem, it's not so great when you've already got something that's massively out of control.  Trust me when I tell you that I've consulted an herbalist, and if I COULD drink some herbs and get rid of this shit, I would have done so long ago.

5.  "Is there an alternative?"  Sure.  I can dig into my own abdomen with a spoon and try to solve the problem, but I don't trust my own surgical skills.

I realize they mean well, but . . .